Favoritism towards 41-year-old brother over inheritance sends adult sister into argument with parents about her wants and needs: 'I guess I was supposed to just accept whatever my brother chooses to grant'

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Aug 21, 2025 1:00 PM EDT

Inheritance, money, and greed can unfurl any healthy relationship. Below, there seems to be a heavy disagreement about finances between siblings. When we're younger, it's more common to fight amongst siblings, but as we get older it becomes more and more petulant. The narrator is a 40 year old woman, and she's had a gripe with her family about finances, money, and inheritance for decades. 

The parents have asked her and her 41 year old brother how they'd like the will to be written, which is already a very thoughtful question. As they express their wants and needs, they don't seem to be eye to eye. There seems so be some favoritism towards the brother, and the sister feels like it's genderized. It ends up that the sister feels taken advantage of, and like she's not getting a say in the matter. I'm just glad my sister and I would never fight about things like this. Read the full story below.

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  • 01

    AITAH — my sibling has been telling my parents for 15 years how he wants their will written so when they asked me, I answered

    Brother and sister fighting
    via courtneyk from Getty Images Signature / Canva

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    Now my dad (parents in their 70s) says I threw him a curve because I (40f) don't want it the way my brother (41m) says to do it.
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia

  • Inheritance is such a tricky thing. Everyone wants the most of something, the best. Sometimes the parents don't realize the damage they're doing by not giving an equal share of things, but ultimately, it's their stuff and money, so they can do what they please with it. 

  • 03
    The thing is I have never felt the freedom to express that with them, except to back up my
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 04
    mom's promise often repeated to me that everything be divided equally.
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 05
    My brother is extremely vocal about how "dumb" my mom's ideas are (selling everything and splitting the proceeds) and has always insisted he wanted land.
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 06
    My dad asked me 15 years ago if it was ok for him to leave all his property to my brother and me to get investments instead. It wasn't
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 07
    then and it isn't now. I definitely felt my dad was not backing up my mom and wanted to favor my brother.
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 08
    So my dad asked me again this week and I told him. I want to split the land and the investments, and I would prefer
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 09
    to own outright, without it automatically passing to my brother's child (I don't have children).
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 10
    Inheritance signature
    via JADE ThaiCatwalk from Jade ThaiCatwalk's Images / Canva

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 11
    It seems like I upset my dad. I guess I was just supposed to accept whatever my brother chooses to grant? I wasn't raised with this much gender inequality.
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 12
    I posted in another sub and a lot of people said I shouldn't be asking for an equal amount because it's not my decision.
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 13
    AITA for responding to all this? EDIT: a lot of people are suggesting having my brother buy me out. He's basically saying he wants it without having to take a loan.
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 14
    Edit 2: my mother is still alive and she said she's going to push again for an equal split.
    via u/DownhomeinGeorgia
  • 15
    skoll-Ghost • 10h ago - NTA he asked and you answered. The only caveat I would throw in is .... Tell him you believe the fairest and
    via u/skoll-Ghost
  • 16
    An open space of land
    via Birkholz from Getty Images Signature / Canva

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 17
    most unbiased solution is to divide everything in half. If the brother wants the land he can use some of his
    via u/skoll-Ghost
  • 18
    portion of the investments and buy you out
    via u/skoll-Ghost
  • 19
    BeachinLife1 • 11h ago I don't know who the people are who said "it's not your decision." Well, in the end, it's NOT your decision, BUT
    via u/BeachinLife1
  • 20
    you were ASKED for your opinion. When you are asked, you can give your truthful opinion. If your dad
    via u/BeachinLife1
  • 21
    didn't want to know what you think, he should not have asked you! Your mom is right, though...everything should be divided equally.
    via u/BeachinLife1
  • 22
    Beth21286 10h ago He asked you to rubber stamp your brother being given preferential treatment so he doesn't have to feel
    via u/Beth21286
  • 23
    guilty about it. He should feel guilty. If he wants to favour one child, that's his problem to deal with the fall
    via u/Beth21286
  • 24
    out, especially if it goes. against your mum's wishes and everything is half hers.
    via u/Beth21286

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family drama inheritance drama brother siblings family feud relationships favoritism parenting lol love family sister reddit thread Reddit funny money dating
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